Dear Zaidy

Dear Zaidy,

Today was your funeral and I’m sorry to say, I wasn’t there. When I joined Peace Corps, people told me I would miss big life moments, but I never thought this would be one of them. I didn’t get to say goodbye or tell you how much I love you. So this is my goodbye.

When mom told me you were in hospice, my first memory that came to mind was when you saved me from choking. I was probably 5 years old and choking on a potato chip at your house and you calmly reached into my throat and pulled it out. I think this is my first big memory of you. I could name countless memories of you taking care of me and always being overprotective. You wouldn’t let us go down the stairs without sliding down on our butts, we always had to hold your hand and when you let us “drive” your Mercedes convertible on your lap we always had a seat belt on. What I once thought as annoying overprotectiveness, I’ve now come to realized it was you showing your love for your family. You always watched over me and made sure I was safe. You sang Tiny Bubbles in the Wine and played the guitar, you never got upset all the countless times I cried for no reason, and you always told me how much you loved me. I couldn’t have wished from a better Zaidy. You taught me how to make a mac and cheese taco using Noodles & Co’s belly button bread (flat bread) and how to draw on restaurant napkins. You’re the reason I eat Cheerios with yogurt instead of milk, that I always walk carefully on ice, that I’m terrified of ladders, and that I make rock totems on every hike. And obviously you taught me how to pose for a picture.

I remember getting you to try sushi and bubble tea and you absolutely hating both, but you’d always try it anyway. I remember your disgust with tapioca balls (you called the buggers) and how we both hate tomatoes. I remember traveling to Mexico, our Disney Cruise, and Arizona with you and how you were always up for any adventure. I remember you taking me to Yom Kippur services and wrapping your tallit around me the entire time because I didn't understand why I couldn't wear my own.

You lived your life to support Bubbie in all of her hopes and dreams. You protected her and made sure she was safe and that you two were secure. She didn’t know how lucky she was to have you beside her, I could only wish to find a husband as supportive as you always were.

When I was in the 8th grade, I got stuck at the mall. Taylor was supposed to pick me up and for some reason didn’t, so I called you and Bubbie. When you two pulled up you got out to give me the front seat, like always. As we drove you handed me a $20 bill and told me to put it in my purse, so I’m never be stranded anywhere again. This is the number 1 advice you ever gave to me. I kept that $20 in my purse, and then moved it to my car when I could drive. I wish I could tell you I still had that same $20 but I’m pretty sure I spent it on something stupid in college, but because of you I always keep an extra $20 hidden somewhere, just encase.

You always told me to follow my dreams, to make sure I was safe and to always save my money. While I never save my money, I hope you’re still proud of me for the women I have become. I know for a fact, you would be so worried about me living half way across the world from you and the family, but you’d still be proud and support me no matter what.

I’m sorry I didn’t get to dance with you one last time.

Love your one and only granddaughter,

Sydney